What Were Your Daddy's Love Patterns?

On the topic of fatherless daughters...perhaps your dad was there...but what were his love patterns?...those patterns can have an impact on girl's life when she reaches adulthood...

These are the 5 Daddy Archetypes found in my program:

Disapproving Dad...there's nothing you could ever do to get his full approval. He always required more from you...he sets the bar high...but doesn't take the time to notice "you" instead of your accomplishments...or perhaps he wanted a boy instead...and it shows...

Impact on Daughter-- this keeps you always seeking approval and never feeling good enough...always trying to be better...you become uptight, overly ambitious and competitive.

Disabled Dad...mental/physical illness, drugs/alcohol, abusive, anger...these things will prevent him from creating a closeness with his daughter...or maybe he's a passive father...doesn't get involved...let's mom handle everything.

Impact on Daughter--this creates a lot of anger in you because of your disappointment...keeps you in a space of shame, insecurity, hiding and distrust...very difficult for you to create close intimate relationships...you even try to become someone you are not...because of the insecurity and shame...you have no real sense of identity.

Dictator Father...it's like living with a military drill sergeant, a whole lot of rules..but no real relationships...religion legalism and tight boundaries...feels like no oxygen in the home...

Impact on Daughter--you grow up to become distant and resentful. You will often times be perceived as cold, unfeeling, angry and focused only on the task at hand instead of people... disconnected from your heart space.

Distant Father...physically or emotionally...unattached and not able to form close bond with daughter...works all the time...can be in the room with you and even involved in activities...but not emotionally connected to anyone...because his focused is always on something else...or he's simply disconnected.

Impact on Daughter--you feel invisible and unworthy...you may try hard to get attention from men...even giving of yourself in ways that do not serve you because you want to be seen and validated.

Doting Father...shows excessive fondness and love for his daughter. She can do no wrong and he's always giving her money and buying her things. She has become more of trophy, something he can show off...yet he really does love her. Through his spoiling her, he has missed some valuable things...such as life lessons of consideration of others, kindness, compassion for others and generosity. He gets the love part, but missed the parent piece in the relationship.

Impact on Daughter--you begin to think that all relationships are this way. You translate gifts and letting you have your way as real love. You become selfish, self centered, spoiled, needy and incapable of seeing the other's person's needs and point of view. You become a taker in the relationship and this leads to you playing the victim in most cases. 

Fathers be sure to check your love patterns when it come to your daughters...

But the good news...it doesn't have to remain this way.....you can learn new patterns and new ways of being with your daughter that will validate her very existence! 

Oprah Winfrey Takes The Issue of Fatherless Daughters Global and Angela Wants to Continue The Conversation

Much has been written and spoken on the subject of boys growing up without their fathers and the negative impact this missing key element has on their lives as they reach adulthood. We’ve read numerous studies that offer alarming statistics of our prisons being filled with men who grew up without their fathers. There are numerous of programs, discussions and books on this alarming topic of fatherless sons.

Yet, little has been brought to the forefront of our attention when it comes to fatherless daughters. Until now!! On July 14th and July 21st, Oprah Winfrey and Iyanla Vanzant will host a 2-Part Life Class on the OWN Network entitled, “Daddyless Daughters.” The effects on a girl’s life who grows up with an unavailable, unattached or absent father can be catastrophic.

An adult woman who did not have the validation, love and support of an attentive and loving father will experience many devastating issues in life from relationships problems, money issues, career and health problems. As The Love Lifestyle Coach and author of “I’m Not That Woman…A Fatherless Daughter’s Journey to Being,” I have been speaking and coaching fatherless daughters for years through my Fatherless Daughters Breakthrough Program.

I am delighted that the OWN Network is bringing this topic onto a global platform and I had a chance to view the taping of the shows via online. We cannot solve these issues in two television shows, but now we can get the conversation started.

That’s why I am hosting a series of online and live events, starting with a FREE live event,“Fatherless Daughters Shares Their Heart Secrets…The Conversation Continues” on Tuesday, July 23rd, 7PM at The Comfort Suites Hotel, 1540 Daulton Drive, Columbia, SC. To attend this event RSVP Here…

Why They Said I Would Fail

I remember a few years ago, I was at a women’s business conference hosted my one of my coaches. When she introduced me, she said “Angela has a SOFT Niche.” What she was basically saying is that I didnt’ talk a lot about making money, getting clients, marketing or all of the stuff that your inbox gets saturated with.

I was merely teaching women how to actualize the power of self love to create success in their lives. I was doing this when “selling self love” was not popular. Fast forward to now, everyone is talking about self love, universal love, inspiration, expansion and all the “woo woo” stuff I was accused of teaching.  It’s popular because collectively, we’ve come to realize that nothing permanent can happen outside of ourselves until it happens within us.  And that love is the answer to every single question in life.

Everywhere you look business coaches are now starting to realize that this “woo woo” stuff works…that spirituality and love are the keys to unlocking real success in  your life and business. I had a coach tell me that what I was offering wasn’t tangible enough. That if I didn’t change it, I would fail. She was obviously the wrong coach for me and she was wrong period. I have literally share with thousands the principles of The Love Lifestyle Coaching System and many of them have had incredible success stories.

That’s why you need a coach who has her finger on the pulse of what’s happening long before the masses get it.  Because by the time the masses gets hold to it, you will be left behind. You want to pioneer a movement, not come in on the tail in. You need a leader who has insight and understand the times in which we now live. It’s time to stop jumping on the band wagon of the next new fad or following the masses because you will get left behind.  

When we find ourselves at a crossroad or in a crisis, to move forward, the challenge is the let go of an outmoded attitude, or idea or perception. Individually or collectively,  a shift has to take place, a tipping point is reached, then the phenomenon of “There’s nothing so powerful as an idea whose time has come, kicks in.

The time has come for LOVE to kick in. The time has come to know that everything is spiritual. Even money!  I knew it years ago when others said that I would fail if I kept trying to coach women on love…that I needed to coach them on making money.  But how could you teach money without love? The two are tied together, because how we do love is how we do money! Ha ha, the masses finally got what we always knew! I love it!

Remember, live authentically, laugh everyday and embrace love as a lifestyle. Because success in life really does begin with love!

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