You Are Not Superwoman!

Yesterday, I was speaking to a member of The Love Story Women Circle and we were sharing with each other the importance of women being apart of a tribal community, such as ours. As women we are inherently tribal.  I can remember a time when women raised their babies together, did laundry together, cooked together and helped each other through the ups and downs of life.

During my child bearing years, I remember giving my old my maternity clothes to the next woman who was pregnant, or as my children out grew their clothing, the clothes automatically went to the next woman who had kids younger than mine.  If someone had a garden, we all were blessed with the fruits of their labor.  One week I'd to pick up everyone's kids from after-school activities, and the next week it was another mommy's turn to play taxi.

If someone's husband walked out on them, the entire tribe gathered our resources to make sure our sister and her children were fed and back on their feet in no time

No one was alone in the tribe, even if they wanted to be. Sunday dinners became shared meals and if someone needed child care, it was never a bother and it was always free.

What happened to those days? What happened to the times when women knew how to make much out of little and we knew the importance of sisterhood and having each other's back?  We have turned out hearts externally to the things which brings us little to no fulfillment. We have become competitive instead of collaborators. We have become covetous instead of complementary. We have become suspicious instead of supportive.  We live in a time where our beliefs are, "independent, strong women are great women."  This false belief of individualism has costs women the very thing that we most need...each other.

We need other women to encourage us, to unstick us when we get stuck, to love us when we can't love ourselves, to remind us of the important things when we forget, to inspire the "heck" out of us with the unlimited possibilities we have in our lives and to call us on our stuff even when we don't really want them to. 

We need our tribes. We need a community of loving, caring sisters who will provide us with endless amounts of inspiration, empowerment, support and love!

As Women We Need:

• A safe place to land: The world can sometimes be harsh, but the right tribe of women can provide a safe and sacred space for you to bring your wounded heart. They will wrap you with love and compassion, while allowing you to vent and breathe without ever having to be judged. They will create the space for you to be nurtured, to heal, to grow and move forward.
• A place where sisters won't let you off the hook: There are times when our thinking and  our behavior  can become  sabotaging to us and these are the times when our tribe is here to call us on our stuff. Everyone of us need that support group that will care enough to confront us on the things that we are doing to neglect ourselves, on our blind spots...the things we can't see for ourselves,  so that we can get back on track and move beyond the real barriers that keeps us from succeeding in life.
• A place to laugh everyday: Life gives us plenty of opportunity for stress, heartache, overwhelm or depression. It's our job to counter those things with laughter, fun, and connection. Have you ever had a terrible day and called a girlfriend and you both ended up laughing at the utter ridiculousness of it all? Suddenly what you thought was going to "take you out" turned out to be what made you stronger because your tribal sister helped you to see it differently and even laugh about it.  Laughter is an important thing in life. We have enough seriousness. We need more laughter.

Do you want to radically change your life? Then it's time to surround yourself with examples of people who will show you that it's possible. 

You're not Superwoman. You're not a one woman roadshow. Stop trying to be perfect and infallible and so great that you never need anything or anyone. 

You! Need! Support!: practical, emotional, spiritual support. 

If you want to live a deeper, more meaningful existence, then engage in deeper, more meaningful conversations with the people talking about deeper more meaningful things.

Whether you've just had a baby, or you are struggling with food, or you're trying to manage a household, love a family, love a partner, and run a business, for the love of all that is good in the world, ask for support. 

Seek out possibilities, surround yourself with inspiration, and what seemed impossible will soon become the only thing you know.

I have available such possibilities for you. If you are a woman who recognizes that she needs the love and support of such tribe, then I want to encourage you to become a member of The Love Story Women Circle Today.

What Does Your Story Say?

That's  a photo of my great grandmother. I did not have the honor of knowing her because by the time I was born, she had already transitioned. But my mother has told me many  wonderful stories about her and I have held those stories dear to my heart. 

Many of the stories have influenced my life in many ways and are the reasons why I am who I am today. As I mature in age, I can't help but wonder how the stories that I am currently creating in my life will impact my great grandchildren?

Stories shape and form our lives in ways that we have not yet begun to understand. They can either have positive impacts on the next generation or they can have negative ones. The great thing about this is that you and I get to choose how we want our stories to impact them. Each day that we live our lives, we are creating stories for the next generation. How do you want your story to read?

My great-grandmother's father was a white man and her mother was black who loved each other dearly. She was born and reared in the deep south during a time where bi-racial children we NOT acceptable. Against many odds, including her life being at risk daily, she became a very successful business woman, wife and mother of nine children. While I have never met her, I know her and what I know has given me the courage to stand in the face of giants and not fear. This is the lesson that Laura Taylor's story taught my mother who is a 45 year breast cancer survival and owned and a successful hair salon for over 38 years. This is the lesson that Laura's story will teach my daughters. 

Just like fire, our stories have power. Power to bring protection and warmth to many or the power to destroy lives. The great thing...you and I get to choose which story we want to leave behind.

Remember, Live Authentically, Laugh Everyday, and Embrace Love as a Lifestyle.

Leave us a comment below, we would love to hear from you.

Are You Really Happy?

Are you really happy with your life? Do you wake up each morning ready to live your life with joy, happiness and love? Are you days filled with laughter and pure bliss? Most people that I meet would answer “no” to these questions.

But it doesn’t have to be this way. Life can be joyous and happy for us when we are able to answer three critical and important questions. These questions are: Who am I? Why am I here? What am I here to do?

When the answers to these questions become the most important and central reality of your life, every choice you make and everything you think and do will reflect that reality.

True satisfaction with life will only come when we discover the authentic core of who we really are and what we are placed on the planet to do. When we are aligned with the who, the what and the why God created us, our joy then becomes filled. When that happens, we will be able to say with a loud shout...I am really and truly happy today!!

What choice can you make today that would be truly consistent with who you are and make your life a joy to live?

When We Don't Have All The Answers

Life has a way of bringing to us the unexpected. But what happens when the unexpected comes wrapped in disappointment? Do we forget about the very foundation of what we believe and stay true to it or do we fold under the pressure?

Yesterday started out to be a great day. My husband and I went for our morning walk; I spent my power hour in mediation/prayer and listened to some personal/spiritual growth information on my IPod.

Then the phone rang and it was my son telling me that they had lost the baby. She was still born. My heart stopped for a moment because we had just experienced this last year, when little Maya was still born. I just didn’t want to do this again.

And the worst was to hear my son’s voice as he shared the information. He said mom, “I wanted this baby so badly.” As I put the phone down, I began to remember who God is and how His Love will comfort and protect us. That is my foundational truth and at this moment I needed to remember it.

When the unexpected comes our way, and there is no explanation for the pain, we must shift our hearts and our minds towards love. Please know that my family and I did experience pain and we couldn’t keep it from coming our way. But we do have a choice...not to suffer.

While this is painful to experience, we will not allow it to make us suffer. As we remain in love’s space and as we continue to love each other and thank God for what we will never understand, we can and will heal.

Loves heals, renews, make us safe, inspires us with its power and brings us closer to God. This is what I know for sure. In times when you don’t have answers, remember that love is the answer to every question.

The ultimate lesson here is that we walk in the light of love and the truth that extends beyond any truth that our human mind presently knows. Because the spiritual mind knows far more than we could ever comprehend. So it’s really okay to not have all the answers, as long as we have love and peace. This is what I know for sure.