Go Get Your Money Ladies!

January is “Financial Awareness Month.”  As women we don’t really like to talk about being financially responsible. We have been the butt of jokes in the media about how we are not good with money. You hear comedians joke about us and TV husbands refer to their wives being gold diggers, shopaholics who like to waste their money. Notice I said, “their money.”

While these jokes may appear humorous to many, I don’t see it to be very funny. This kind of programming has become imbedded in the subconscious minds of many women and is now showing up in their lives on large scales.

Yes, women are earning more money than our mothers and grandmothers. We are moving up the ranks as high income earners and players in the game. Yet, we are failing when it comes to building significant wealth unless you count Chanel handbags and red bottom Louis Vuitton shoes as part of your financial portfolio.

A few years ago, I was in a meeting with some very powerful women and one of them was Kim Kiyosaki. Kim is the wife of Robert Kiyosaki the author of Rich Dad Poor Dad. Let’s pause for a moment. Do you see how I introduced Kim by referring to her husband? This is my point exactly. As women, it’s time that we begin to stand in our own power. I’m not talking some radical “we don’t need a man” kind of attitude. But one of great concern to establish ourselves as leading experts in the realm of money and long term wealth.

Kim’s book “Rich Woman” is a great read for any woman who is ready to take control of her financial destiny. A lot has changed in the investment world since she wrote the book, but it is a great read for those wanting to learn more about the world of creating financial wealth.

It’s not how much money you earn, it’s really how much you keep that makes you wealthy. It’s time that women get smarter with their money. In here book,  Kim will offer you a lot of externals to creating wealth, which is necessary. But today, I want to take a little different approach when it comes to money.

What causes money show up in your life in abundance and cause it stick is LOVE! That’s correct, money will always follow love and value. If you are ready to make wealth and abundance apart of your life, then it’s time that you make  Love a Lifestyle as your priority.

I want to share with you 3 things you can do immediately to change your money situation.

Change the way you feel about money. We learn our attitudes about money initially from our family. We’ve heard things like, “money don’t grow on trees or do I look like a money tree to you?” Some of us have even heard, “we could never afford anything like that.” It’s these kinds of beliefs that form our feelings about money. Including our religious training. Much of the religious teaching have us afraid to say that “we desire money.” We become afraid of appearing greedy or not spiritual. But when you study some of the world’s religions and their locations and buildings, you will see infinite wealth all around. It has been said that if we could sell of all of the real estate, properties, paintings, statues and other valuables owned by the world’s religious institutions, there would be enough to make every living person wealthy. You’ve got to change your feelings and your relationship with money money and when that happens, money begins to find you.

Find meaningful work. Money has a way of following joy. When you do the work that you love and you are passionate about, you will earn extraordinary money doing it.  Your dream job creates in you higher frequencies of Love and that goes out to the universe and comes back to you in the form of abundance. Find out what you love to do and get busy doing it. Discover your sweet spot and transform yourself into an abundant magnet machine.

Give it away. Only what we don’t give in any situation is missing. When you need something, the best way to get it is to give it. It’s a spiritual law that the wealthy has understood forever. Often times we hold onto our last because we hold a belief that there’s no more coming. That’s a scarcity mentality.  But when you understand that there’s unlimited supply of wealth in the universe, it doesn’t become difficult to give money. Create a lifestyle of giving. While we should give to those who are less fortunate, there is something to be said about planting your money in wealthy soil as well. I have given to mult-millionaires such as dinners, gifts and etc. I have always reaped very well because of it. Whomever you decide to give to or whatever, simply do it without anyone’s knowledge. Giving anonymously is a great way to receive back quickly.  I recommend giving 10 percent in tithes. This spiritual law has worked when understood correctly. There’s a way to tithe which will turn on the magic of abundance in your life. Always remember to give because you love to give.

It’s time that we women stop being the butt of bad jokes when it comes to money. It’s time that we take our financial matters seriously. We’ve got to teach our daughters to do the same. Money in and of itself is useless. But when we can use money to change laws, to change cultures to stamp out poverty, to empower communities economically, then we are becoming the real change makers. You playing small and remaining financially broke serves no one. Not you, not your family, not your community and not your world. Go get your money ladies!!

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Losing My Friend Taught Me My Greatest Lesson

I  remember having a conversation a year ago in January with a very good friend of mine about her writing a book and starting her mentoring and coaching business.

We talked some about strategies and marketing and when she wanted to get started. I knew that she was passionate about this and ready to make it happen. But just like most women in business, we allow other people's demands and needs to take priority over ours. We find logical reasons why we must wait, postpone and delay our dreams.

We say things such as, "I got to get my son ready for college, my daughter's prom is next month or my husband doesn't feel it's the right time now." But when does being a mother and a wife cancel out when and how you are to live your own dreams? While many women blame these reasons on not living their dreams, the reality is that we are simply afraid of standing in our own power.

My friend had done some great things already as a business woman. But this new journey was something she was very passionate about.  Because it was a personal journey, one that was dear to her heart and one where she would indeed unleash her greatest potential to shine.

Unfortunately her dream was never realized. Because in October of last year, I attended my friend's funeral. While I was hurt and broken about losing such an amazing, extraordinary woman and friend, I couldn't help but cry because her dream was never realized. Her true, authentic purpose  was finally revealed to her and she was beginning to sit in her sweet spot.

But you and I will never benefit from that vision, the one she and I had discussed. Her children and her husband and all of the people she would have reached through her vision won't get to experience the magnitude of what it could have brought to the planet.

I miss my friend every single day and I wonder could I have done more?  When she and I spoke the first of the year in 2012 to lay out the vision, we didn't speak again until June. I could sense2 that we needed to move forward. But like most women, her family demands took priority and she was starting to get really sick. We never spoke again. The next call that I received from her number was her husband calling to say that she was gone.

During her funeral service, I literally broke down. Because I knew her personal dreams and I knew how much she wanted this vision to be her legacy. As I left my friend's funeral, I made a decision that I would live my life out loud in a more powerful and magnificent way. That I would move further out of my comfort zone and take more risk.  I promised to push you a little harder  by encouraging you to not let the dream die inside of you.  I committed to reaching more people through my writings, my blogs, my radio show, my social media and all of my weekly columns and master channel videos. I now reach approximately 1.5 million people each month through all of these outlets.

I have vowed to do more speaking to encourage you and others to "move out of your comfort zones, take risk and live your dreams now."

Beautiful woman. You've been holding a space for everyone else to shine, but who is holding a space for you?  It's time that you begin creating that space. I will continue to call you, to send out the emails,  to share with you on my radio shows,  my conference calls and to create even more powerful transformative services/events/programs/products to help empower you to live your dreams fully.  I am willing to stand with you, to hold a space for your brilliance to shine and to even stand for you until you  when you can't stand for yourself.

But you must say "yes." Yes to yourself first and give yourself permission to be powerful.  The revival of your love story does begin with you. It starts with a deep abiding self love that forces you to step up, to invest in yourself even when everyone and everything else is demanding your time and money. This kind of self love will allow you to move in the direction of your heart's longing without guilt and without delay.

I carried my friend's obituary in my purse for weeks and finally took it out right before christmas. On today, after writing this article, I will finally remove her phone number out of my phone and her email address from my data base. She will forever remain in my heart, even though I feel she is gone too soon. She has taught me the greatest lessons about stepping up and about playing big. She taught me how to live my dreams now!

My intention here is not to incite fear, but to inspire passionate action.   So in closing, I will say to you what I also said to my friend on the last time we spoke to each other,  "it's time to do it now girl. It's time to put yourself first. I will show you how to do it. Let me know when you are ready to get started and we can make it happen." Unfortunately, she never called me back.  What about you, will you call me back?

Remember, live authentically, laugh everyday and embrace love as a lifestyle.

Your Father-Daughter Relationship: A Must Read Now!

Hello Beautiful Woman,

I have the privilege of speaking to women everyday on how to live their best lives. How they can earn more money in their businesses, improve their love life and gain more energy and health in their bodies.But I also witness women struggle to make their lives work. 

They struggle with finding balance between work and family, keeping their bodies healthy and making room for their own dreams to be realized.While many of today's women are ambitious, driven and appear to have it altogether. I have noticed that everything is not as it really appears. Many women are lonely, stuck in a rut, struggling to make their businesses successful, to earn more money and are even unhappy with their bodies and life in general. Why is it that we are having such difficulty with our self esteem, with our need for approval and this intense need to be better or to have more?

I have discovered the answer is because we have not learned how to truly love who we are. Perhaps on the surface and it shows up in ways such as getting a massage, a mani, pedi, taking a vacation and etc. We tend to think that's loving ourselves. But millions of women with low self esteem and no self love, get massages and take vacations.I'm speaking of something deeper. Something hidden deep with in each of us that holds a fundamental belief that we are somehow not enough, not lovable and not good enough. Where does a belief of this sort come from? 

In my work, I have discovered that this belief has it's root in our father-daughter relationships. It shows up in our lives as the Fatherless Daughter Syndrome.I define a fatherless daughter as a girl who grew up with an unattached, unavailable or absent father. But I have also discovered that many women whose father was fully present still suffer from the syndrome. The impact of our father-daughter relationship is showing up in the life that you are currently experiencing. Much of it is based on your daddy's love patterns. 

Perhaps your dad was not unavailable, absent or unattached. But he may have been a disapproving dad, a feminist dad, a nice-guy dad, a narcissistic dad, or a harboring dad. Whatever his love style, your life has been influenced by it in many ways and on several levels.The danger is in not being aware and not doing anything to change it. We fatherless daughters are a national dilemma. We may not make the six o'clock news, but we are here. Then again, the impact on our lives sometimes 

make the news such as domestic violence, competitiveness, joblessness, alarming number of single moms and high divorce rates. 

A girl learns to love herself through the love she sees reflected back to her in her daddy's eyes. When this doesn't happen in a very healthy manner, the impact of this one missing element can be catastrophic on a woman's life when she reaches adulthood. It will impact our relationships with our men, our children, our co workers, ourselves and our bodies. While many women may have seen very healthy love reflected back to them from their dads, there are millions who did not. And others who had dads with love patterns that were some what difficult to digest.

 Ask any group of adult women to talk about their relationships with their own fathers, and rarely will you get a lukewarm response. You'll hear, "My dad is my hero and he had huge positive influence on me," or "My dad was an insensitive, inattentive jerk and had a huge negative influence on me." Of course the most important words are huge influence.If you don't learn how your father-daughter relationship is influencing your life today, you could remain stuck on that up and down roller coaster of life. 

Your dad's influence on your life was his responsibility. But our doing something about it and healing our lives is our opportunity.I want to invite you to join me tonight at 7PM EST. for the kick off of The Fatherless Daughter Breakthrough Program. This is your opportunity to erase and eliminate the negative influences of your father-daughter relationship on your life today. This is not about blaming, but explaining, awareness and breakthroughs.

Register Now: http://www.myjourneytobeing.com/coaching-program

Get Front and Center

We are all working on our New Year’s Intentions. I’ve spoken to several women who have written out their career goals, their family goals and  personal goals. But often times what we call personal goals are not really personal goals because we tend to leave ourselves out of them. 

I have discovered that many women are afraid to star in their own life’s story. We make everyone else the star in our stories and we are somewhere in the backgrounds. But this is your life. This is your story and you deserve to be front and center in it. You deserve the leading role in your own life’s story.

When will you stop playing the stand in or the supporting role?  We organize ourselves around everyone else’s life, such as our children, our husbands, our careers and leave ourselves completely out. We hold a space for everyone else’s brilliance and for everyone else to shine. But who’s holding the space for you? It’s time that you begin the star in your own story.

One reason we remain behind the scenes is because we are afraid of the spotlight. The spotlight not only allows us to shine, but it also shines on and reveals our weak places. But I have a news flash for you. We don’t have weak places…we have wounds that just haven’t yet healed.  It’s okay to show your wounds. The last man who showed us his wounds, literally changed the world. That man was Jesus!! 

 I believe there are three things we can do to begin starring in our own life’s story…

1.  Learn the script. Each of us come into this world with a holy script that was written for us by our Creator. Then our parents through their rearing us, kind of rewrote that script. It’s our job as adults to re-discover what the original script said and begin directing that in our lives. We can do this through lots of spiritual work such as meditation, stillness and prayer. Make these practices a part of your daily life and watch your original script unfold for you. Understanding who you are and what you are here to do is what you will soon discover as your original script.

2.  Treat yourself like a star. You’ve heard the stories of celebrities who get the star treatment. Begin to see yourself as valuable as the highest paid celebrity. Treat yourself good by eating right, exercising, investing in personal growth programs, getting proper rest and smiling. You have to see the value in yourself before the world will. When you treat yourself like a star, so will the world. Love yourself more deeply and watch what happens.

3.  Walk in your leading role. As a leading lady in your life, you must take center stage. No one looks for the star of a broadway play in the corner stage. She’s always front and center and has the most lines. You get to speak up for yourself, no one can do that for you. Learn to say “no” to others when you need to. Learn to say “yes” to yourself often. Stop hiding behind the scenes , it’s time to get front and center. The spotlight is on you leading lady.!!

Begin to see your value and your real worth. God  created you perfect just the way you are. As you align with that real person and learn to value and appreciate your worth, something magical will happen. The world around you will take notice and the good in life will begin to show up  and life for you will become blissful and joyous. Simply, because you decided to move front and center to stand in the leading role of your life.

Remember, live authentically, laugh everyday and embrace love as a lifestyle.

Be sure to leave a comment below and let us here how you will begin to show up in your leading role.

The Emergence of The Awakened Woman

Are you ready to shine in 2013? For the first time in recorded history women are starting to un-mask, and step up to really see ourselves authentically and bring the best of who we are to the table.

We are gathering everywhere. I am  hearing about online communities being formed, women’s conferences and retreats are at an all time high and we are coming together on larger scales.  There’s a pulling on all of us–a call towards the realization of our highest potential and service to the greater good.

We are beginning to realize our full potential as a celebration and an affirmation of life. Many of us are beginning to feel frustrated,  because whatever is happening inside of us must emerge now. It seems as if we are on a journey without a compass navigating towards territory we’ve never been before.

For some women, this can be frightening and the temptation to turn around is strong. You have started to doubt  your value and feel some anxiety about what  you have to offer. It’s because you feel invisible in comparison to your fellow sister who seems to have more…more education, more talents or more money.

You have become terrified about stepping up in a big way because you have become accustom to playing small. You don’t feel safe and you don’t feel secure.

I am here to tell you that it’s okay to feel that way, but it’s not okay to remain in that space. Of course women want safety and security. It’s what we all want. We love making others feel safe and we love rescuing each other. In fact, rescuing can be seductive to us. It feels better to rescue than to show up in our own lives. Because we can hide behind those we are rescuing. This is just another way for us to play it small.

As women, we keep each other small by agreeing with our stories of victimization. But this is how we lie to each other about the illusions we carry about ourselves.

Our conversations must change for the emergence to be complete. We’ve got to transcend these old patterns that no longer serves who are today. It’s time for us to pioneer new ways of being, new goals of our awakened sacred partnerships.

I believe there are three things we need for us to experience the realization of this new emergence:

1. We need Courage and Skills. Sometimes we just have to jump and grow our wings on the way. Anytime you move beyond your comfort zone, you will experience fear. The goal is to push past the fear and learn the new skills to move forward. Often times we know what to do, but there appears a gap between what we know to do and what we actually do. Courage will give you the push to do it and gaining new skills will show you how to do it.
2. We Need to Find the Right Tribe.  I’m talking about a tribe of women who are willing to stand with you and for you, until you can stand for yourself. There’s nothing more beautiful than being apart of an authentic, loving and supportive tribe.
3. We Need the Right Mentor. You need a mentor who is not afraid to point out your blind spots… the things that we don’t know about ourselves.  You need a real mentor…someone who will challenge you to become a more expanded version of who you can be. A person who will not tolerate you playing small and not partake in it.

We have not witnessed a lot of role models of women who are holding this kind of power collectively.  We certainly don’t see it on television. But the times we are now living are calling for this kind of conversation, this kind of collaboration, this kind of power and this kind of partnerships.  The Awakened Sacred Women Partnerships.

2013 can be your best year! If you are willing to implement the above steps in your life right now, your future can be as bright as a shining star. It really is your time to shine!!

Remember, live authentically, laugh everyday and embrace love as a lifestyle!

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You Are Not Superwoman!

Yesterday, I was speaking to a member of The Love Story Women Circle and we were sharing with each other the importance of women being apart of a tribal community, such as ours. As women we are inherently tribal.  I can remember a time when women raised their babies together, did laundry together, cooked together and helped each other through the ups and downs of life.

During my child bearing years, I remember giving my old my maternity clothes to the next woman who was pregnant, or as my children out grew their clothing, the clothes automatically went to the next woman who had kids younger than mine.  If someone had a garden, we all were blessed with the fruits of their labor.  One week I'd to pick up everyone's kids from after-school activities, and the next week it was another mommy's turn to play taxi.

If someone's husband walked out on them, the entire tribe gathered our resources to make sure our sister and her children were fed and back on their feet in no time

No one was alone in the tribe, even if they wanted to be. Sunday dinners became shared meals and if someone needed child care, it was never a bother and it was always free.

What happened to those days? What happened to the times when women knew how to make much out of little and we knew the importance of sisterhood and having each other's back?  We have turned out hearts externally to the things which brings us little to no fulfillment. We have become competitive instead of collaborators. We have become covetous instead of complementary. We have become suspicious instead of supportive.  We live in a time where our beliefs are, "independent, strong women are great women."  This false belief of individualism has costs women the very thing that we most need...each other.

We need other women to encourage us, to unstick us when we get stuck, to love us when we can't love ourselves, to remind us of the important things when we forget, to inspire the "heck" out of us with the unlimited possibilities we have in our lives and to call us on our stuff even when we don't really want them to. 

We need our tribes. We need a community of loving, caring sisters who will provide us with endless amounts of inspiration, empowerment, support and love!

As Women We Need:

• A safe place to land: The world can sometimes be harsh, but the right tribe of women can provide a safe and sacred space for you to bring your wounded heart. They will wrap you with love and compassion, while allowing you to vent and breathe without ever having to be judged. They will create the space for you to be nurtured, to heal, to grow and move forward.
• A place where sisters won't let you off the hook: There are times when our thinking and  our behavior  can become  sabotaging to us and these are the times when our tribe is here to call us on our stuff. Everyone of us need that support group that will care enough to confront us on the things that we are doing to neglect ourselves, on our blind spots...the things we can't see for ourselves,  so that we can get back on track and move beyond the real barriers that keeps us from succeeding in life.
• A place to laugh everyday: Life gives us plenty of opportunity for stress, heartache, overwhelm or depression. It's our job to counter those things with laughter, fun, and connection. Have you ever had a terrible day and called a girlfriend and you both ended up laughing at the utter ridiculousness of it all? Suddenly what you thought was going to "take you out" turned out to be what made you stronger because your tribal sister helped you to see it differently and even laugh about it.  Laughter is an important thing in life. We have enough seriousness. We need more laughter.

Do you want to radically change your life? Then it's time to surround yourself with examples of people who will show you that it's possible. 

You're not Superwoman. You're not a one woman roadshow. Stop trying to be perfect and infallible and so great that you never need anything or anyone. 

You! Need! Support!: practical, emotional, spiritual support. 

If you want to live a deeper, more meaningful existence, then engage in deeper, more meaningful conversations with the people talking about deeper more meaningful things.

Whether you've just had a baby, or you are struggling with food, or you're trying to manage a household, love a family, love a partner, and run a business, for the love of all that is good in the world, ask for support. 

Seek out possibilities, surround yourself with inspiration, and what seemed impossible will soon become the only thing you know.

I have available such possibilities for you. If you are a woman who recognizes that she needs the love and support of such tribe, then I want to encourage you to become a member of The Love Story Women Circle Today.

ARe You a Ride or Die Chick?

What is a Ride or Die Chick?  According to the Urban Dictionary,  she is, "A chick that ain't afraid to be down with her man,  she'll do anything her man needs her to do. Ride or die chick' refers to someone who (normally a girl, hence the word chick) is down for everything & anything.  Basically down for both the bad and the good. A female who is willing to stick with you even if death is the ultimate fate of their relationship."

Not that's what I call a woman who is committed to the end. I'm not sure if I am willing to be down for anything, but I  know for a fact that I am down for everything that God has called me to do. 

I have joked about me being a "ride or die chick" in terms of my commitment to my friendships,  to my work and even my relationship with God.  But on a serious note, I believe in my heart that's exactly who I aim to be.

Our young people use this term loosely when they are talking the "Jargon" to each other in expressing their commitment and love to each other and the girls to their men.  While the term has been used as gang jargon to talk about negative things, I believe we can learn a little something from concept of  this uncanny phrase. 

Are you a "ride or die chick" when it comes to your commitment to your family, your friendships, your work,  your purpose in life and to your relationship with God?

There was a line in the movie "A Few Good Men" spoken by Jack Nicholas that said, "We use words like honor, code, loyalty...we use these words as the backbone to a life spent defending something. You use 'em as a punchline."

Sometimes this rings true when we tell ourselves and each other that we are committed to our true purpose of making a difference in the world, to standing up for injustice, to protecting our children, to protecting the truth of who God is. Yet, often times we falter and get side tracked when trouble arrives.

But that's not the truth of who we are. As women, as mothers of the world, we know how to stand in the face of the fear to protect what belongs to us. It's in our DNA and that's who we are. Courageous, Honorable and Loyal. Even when trouble appears.

I want to encourage you to stand in your power and begin to align yourself with your true essence. Begin to allow your actions to match your words. 

If there is a gap between what you are saying and what you are actually doing?  Then an intervention needs to take place in your life quickly.

There was a time when I would sit and talk about all the wonderful ideas I was going to make happen and how I was going to do this, and do that and at the end of the day it was just "talk." I needed an intervention and I got the help I needed. I wanted my words to match my actions.  No! I NEEDED my words to match my actions.

People begin to lose confidence in what you say when you are constantly making promises and predictions, yet they see nothing happen. And the most dangerous thing that happens is that you are teaching your subconscious to believe that you are a liar. And that's not who you really are.

We've got to become like the "ride or die chicks" and begin to commit to the things that are important in life...the things that will help to make the our own lives and the lives of others richer and better. The things that will bring change and transformation to a world that so desperately needs it. To demonstrate to our children that "real ride or die chicks" stand for what's right, what's good, what's expansive and loving. To stop playing small and dimming down to living our lives in full blast, full voice while becoming one with God and loyal to each other.

I believe that's God's way. I believe that's Love's way. 

So if you ask me if I am a "ride or die chick?" The answer is "Yes!" I am committed to the end...to that which I know God has called me to do.  What about you? 

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